


like riding a bike

by unconventionalturtle



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Jack is very sweet but a little stupid sometimes, Learning Basic Skills, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:20:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28363794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unconventionalturtle/pseuds/unconventionalturtle
Summary: Jack Zimmermann cannot ride a bike.In all honesty he’s kind of surprised he made it to 26 without it becoming a problem.Unfortunately, now he is 26 and it is a problem.
Relationships: Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann
Comments: 22
Kudos: 142





	like riding a bike

**Author's Note:**

> This is just me pushing my "Jack Zimmermann is a drama queen who can't ride a bike" agenda because I think it's funny.

Jack Zimmermann cannot ride a bike.

In all honesty he’s kind of surprised he made it to 26 without it becoming a problem.

Unfortunately, now he _is_ 26 and it _is_ a problem.

It’s the end of January and he and Bitty are planning their summer trip when it finally comes up.

“Oh Jack, look at this!” Bitty says excitedly, looking at something on his laptop. “We could take a bike tour through the city and along the coast! I’ve always wanted to do a bike tour!”

“You want to do a bike tour?”

“Jack come look at these pictures, it’s so pretty!”

He leans over Bitty’s shoulder to look at the photos on the website. It is very pretty. Too bad Jack doesn’t know how to ride a bike.

“Can’t we just walk though?”

Bitty turns and levels him with a look.

“It’s 11 miles, that’s a really long walk.”

“Ok yeah, but a _bike_ tour?”

He squints at him. “Do you have something against bikes?”

_Yes._ Jack thinks. _I can’t ride one._

“No,” he says out loud instead and cringes at how defensive it sounds.

“We don’t have to do it if you don’t want to,” Bitty offers gently.

“No, no, we should, you just said you’ve always wanted to do one.”

Bitty narrows his eyes at him again but registers them anyways after Jack reassures him that he’s certain he wants to.

_He can learn to ride a bike by July._

_Right?_

* * *

Jack knows that if he asked, any of his friends would teach him. Unfortunately, asking any of them is completely out of the question.

All of the Falconers are out because the big news in the locker room this week is that Thirdy’s daughter no longer needs training wheels on the bike she got for Christmas. She’s five.

Shitty would help in a heartbeat, but he would also be subjected to lethal levels of chirping and the SMH group chat would definitely hear about it.

Obviously, the logical answer is just to ask Bitty. But admitting to his fiancé that he agreed to a bike tour even though he can’t ride a bike isn’t exactly on Jack’s list of things he wants to do. Anyways, he’s an adult and a professional athlete. He can definitely teach himself how to ride a bike.

* * *

Jack forgets about it for a little while because there’s snow on the ground and then he spends a week on the road. But when he gets back, Bitty is in New York for two days, meeting with a sponsor and Jack has a rare two-day break. The snow has melted and it’s the perfect opportunity for him to learn to ride a bike. On his way back from optional skate he swings by the sporting goods store and buys the most basic bike and helmet he can find.

The next morning, he wakes up at 6am like he does every morning, but instead of heading out for a run, he takes his bike and drives to a nearby park that’s usually fairly empty this time of day. Normally he wouldn’t try and learn a new skill during the season and risk a stupid injury, but he’s really not concerned. He’s been riding stationary bikes for years and there’s no way an actual bike can be that much different.

It’s that much different.

He can’t figure out how to get both feet on the pedals without falling over and its frankly embarrassing. He thinks he’s finally got it and makes it two feet down the sidewalk before falling over. Jack lays on the ground for a moment and groans. His hands hurt, his knee is bleeding, his ego is bruised, and he’s unreasonably frustrated for 6 in the morning. He glances around and breathes a sigh of relief that no one’s around. He can imagine the headlines now:

Falcs Forward Jack Zimmermann Falls While Riding Bike: Is This a Sign That He’s Using Again?

He Can Skate, But Can He Cycle? Photos Prove NHLer Jack Zimmermann Can’t Ride a Bike!

He grits his teeth and gets up and tries not to think about how embarrassing it is that 4-year olds can ride bikes and he can’t. He’s planning to try again, but just then a mom and her daughter ride into the park and Jack decides he’s had enough. This is embarrassing enough without witnesses.

* * *

His parents always wake up early so when the clock hits 8am he dials their number.

“Âllo?” his father answers.

“Why did you never teach me how to ride a bike?”

“Good morning Jack. Nice to hear from you, we’re doing well, thank you for asking,” his father responds.

Jack rolls his eyes even though he knows he can’t see it.

“Why did you and Maman never teach me how to ride a bike?” he repeats.

“You don’t know how to ride a bike?”

Jack groans.

“Alicia, come here! Jack’s on the phone!” he hears his father call and he sighs. He’s not sure why he thought this was a good idea.

“Good morning Jack,” his mother says brightly.

“Why did neither of you ever teach me how to ride a bike?” he asks for the third time.

It’s quiet for a moment.

“Oh Bobby,” his mother says, “our 26-year-old son can’t ride a bike.”

It’s quiet for another moment before both his parents burst into laughter.

“This isn’t _funny_ ,” he whines, “this is _your_ fault.”

“Oh sweetheart, we would have taught you if you’d asked but you never seemed interested,” his mother responds in a gentle voice that is tinged with far too much laughter to be placating.

“And you didn’t think it was, perhaps, an important life skill that I needed to learn _anyways_?”

Jack knows he’s blowing this out of proportion, but he’s embarrassed and his knee hurts and it’s stupid that he can’t ride a fucking bike.

“Jack, you’ve _never_ mentioned riding a bike to us before today,” his father adds more calmly. “It doesn’t seem like it’s been a particularly important skill for you to have.”

“Why do you need to know how to ride a bike anyways?” his mother asks.

Jack sighs.

“We were planning our summer trip and Bitty wanted to do a bike tour,” he admits.

“And you didn’t think to tell him that you can’t ride a bike?”

“He seemed so _excited_ though. And I assumed I could just figure it out before July.”

“And how is that going,” his mother asks, in a way that suggests she knows it is not going well.

“It would be going _better_ if my parents taught me how to ride a bike when I was a kid.”

His parents laugh again, and Jack is aware he’s acting like a child, but he’s thinks it’s warranted in this case.

“Sweetheart, just ask Eric to help you.”

“He probably won’t even chirp you that much,” his father adds unhelpfully.

Jack groans. “Thank you both, this was all very useful.”

He ends up spending another 20 minutes talking to his parents and by the time he hangs up the phone he does feel better.

That night he spends half an hour watching “how to ride a bike” videos and eventually admits to himself that it would probably be easier if he just asked Bitty for help. He’s going to have to explain why there’s a bike in the hallway anyways.

* * *

Normally he picks Bitty up from the airport when he gets back from trips, but today he’s staying home so he can have dinner ready when Bitty gets back. Jack likes it like this, when he can be the one to have dinner ready when Bitty comes in the door since it’s so often the other way around. Tonight however, making dinner is more to distract him from the inevitable humiliation coming his way.

Jack is sitting at the counter when he hears the key in the lock. Normally Jack would be happy to have Bitty home, but currently all he feels is dread.

“I’m home!” Bitty calls out as he opens the door.

“In the kitchen!” Jack calls back, bracing himself.

He hears Bitty drop his bag and walk towards the kitchen.

“Honey? Why is there a bike in our apartment?”

Jack sighs and buries his face in his hands.

“Because I don’t know how to ride a bike,” he mumbles, half hoping that Bitty won’t hear.

It’s quiet and Jack lifts his head to look at Bitty who’s looking at him with a fond little half-smile.

“Jack, you don’t know how to ride a bike?”

He shakes his head morosely and Bitty presses a hand to his mouth the way he does when he’s trying not to giggle. 

“Don’t _laugh_ at me.”

Bitty breaks and lets out a giggle. Jack drops his face back into his hands.

“Oh honey, I’m—you just look so _sad_ right now.”

“Because it’s embarrassing,” he whines.

Bitty giggles again but he makes his way over and Jack feels him lay his arms over his shoulders. Despite his annoyance he settles back against him.

Bitty hooks his chin over Jack’s shoulder and Jack lifts his head to lean it against Bitty’s.

“Why didn’t you say something when I signed us up for that bike tour?”

Jack closes his eyes and sighs. “You seemed so excited about it, I figured I could learn before July and it wouldn’t matter.”

Bitty presses a kiss to his cheek.

“That’s really sweet, but also kind of stupid.”

“I know.”

“I bet Thirdy would let you borrow his daughter’s training wheels,” Bitty suggests, “You know, since she doesn’t need them anymore.”

Jack turns his head to glare at Bitty who bursts into giggles.

* * *

Upon Jack’s insistence, they end up in the same park, this time at 5am. Jack isn’t taking any chances.

Bittle, to Jack’s chagrin, was apparently so delighted by the prospect of teaching Jack how to ride a bike that he didn’t even complain about the early hour.

In the end, it really isn’t actually that hard to figure out. It does however help to have Bitty there to explain things. It does not help when Bitty falls on the ground laughing when Jack admits he thought it would be like riding a stationary bike.

After an hour and several photos and videos for Bitty to send Jack’s parents he’s officially mastered the art of riding a bike.

They’re sitting on a bench drinking coffee from a nearby café when Bitty asks.

“Obviously I won’t if you don’t want me to, but can I tweet this?”

Jack considers this. It’s not that he wants the world to know that he learned to ride a bike 20 years too late. But— it actually is kind of funny.

He’s pretty sure all his friends will find out anyways and it’s probably best to get the chirping over with now. And he knows the PR team is still trying to push a more “approachable” and “relatable” image for him. He’s not sure how “relatable” learning to ride a bike in your mid-20s is, but it seems like something the PR team would like.

He sighs.

“One tweet. No pictures. No videos”

Bitty grins and leans up to kiss him on the cheek.

“I hope you’re ready for the chirping,” Bitty says as he presses post.

“Best to get it over with now rather than later.”

Bitty laughs and knocks his shoulder against Jack.

“Jokes aside I am proud of you,” he says.

Jack frowns and turns to look at him.

“You asked for help when you needed it _and_ you learned a new skill,” he says seriously. “That’s something to be proud of.”

Jack smiles. “Yeah I guess it is.”

* * *

**@omgcheckplease**

Big day for @jlzimmermann who finally learned how to ride a bike!

**@dustinsnowy**

@omgcheckplease @jlzimmermann Wow Jack, proud of you and all the 5 year olds who also learned how to ride a bike today!

**@bsknight**

@omgcheckplease @jlzimmermann Jack I’m so proud of you but also how tf did this happen

**@tatertot**

@omgcheckplease @jlzimmermann Zimmboni! How you win Stanley Cup before you learn how to ride bike?

**@badbob**

@omgcheckplease @jlzimmermann I’m so proud of you son!

**@jlzimmermann**

@badbob You realize you could have prevented this right? You could have taught me how to ride a bike 20 years ago :-/

**@rrobison**

@omgcheckplease @jlzimmermann hey Jack, my kid said you can borrow her training wheels if you need them, you know, since she learned how to ride a bike last month

**@justin_coco**

@omgcheckplease @jlzimmermann Jack… bro… this is like so embarrassing man

**Author's Note:**

> I don't understand twitter so if I messed up the formatting please let me know.   
> Also you can find me on tumblr @unconventional-turtle!


End file.
